Yankee Doodle stuck a feather in his cap and the State called it a felony

Yankee Doodle went to town
A-ridin' on a pony.
Stuck a feather in his hat
And called it 'macaroni'.

Then a Blue Line Mafia goon, commonly called a "police officer", alerted to a possible "sovereign citizen" [sic] by the Flock cameras he was watching his ex with, rushed to the scene to cause trouble.

Cop: "License, registration, and the animal's health certificate and vaccination records."

Yankee Doodle: "What?"

Cop: "You heard me. Are you resisting?"

Yankee Doodle: "...?"

Cop: "Where are you going, what is your business there, and where are you coming from?"

Yankee Doodle: "Why?"

Cop: "I need your identification."

Yankee Doodle: "My name is Yankee Doodle."

Cop: "That's obviously an alias, and that gives me reasonable suspicion to arrest you."

Yankee Doodle: "What's going on?"

Cop: "Do you have anything on you that I need to know about?"

Yankee Doodle: "No."

Cop: "I smell marijuana- possibly alcohol, too, and is that a gun?"

Yankee Doodle: "I don't understand the questions. This is America."

Cop: "Hey, that looks like an eagle feather in your cap. You're going to prison, boy!"

Yankee Doodle: "I found this feather on the ground, but I don't know what kind it is. I call it my 'macaroni'." 

Cop: "So, you are on drugs... "

Yankee Doodle: "What? No, 'macaroni' means..."

Cop: "Stop resisting! DON'T MOVE! PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR AND HAND ME YOUR PAPERS!!"

In the scuffle, while attacking an innocent traveler and dragging him from his horse, the cop manages to shoot himself in the foot because of the extraordinarily dangerous situation he created. 

Cop: "SHOTS FIRED! Officer down! Send backup NOW!!!!!!"

FOX News reports that a probable Antifa-affiliated Democratic Socialist commie attacked and injured a heroic officer who was just trying to keep us all safe. "He should have complied faster." Fortunately for the sake of "lawn odor", he was neutralized by the responding thugscrum. Two officers were injured in the firefight, but it isn't clear who fired those shots. The department promises to "thoroughly investigate" itself before finding that none of its officers did anything wrong.

CNN reports that another "white nationalist" has committed "gun violence", which shows again that only government employees can be trusted to have guns.

MSNBC, or whatever it calls itself now, sat and drooled while eating crayons and paste.

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Aliens, government, and "disclosure"

There is most likely life on other planets. Intelligent life and civilizations are probably widespread throughout the Universe.

I consider it a remote possibility that maybe some of them have visited Earth for some reason.

But, if governments ever confirm it through "disclosure", I'm going to change my mind on the visitation part. 

That is more likely to be propaganda than reality. I'll then assume government hasn't got a clue, but is saying it to manipulate the public to fit some agenda that empowers government.

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BBQ Guns

I occasionally see videos where the topic is "BBQ Guns"- a gun you would wear, openly, to a gun-owner-friendly BBQ where that was the dress code- or even kind of the whole point.

I want to go to a BBQ like that! I've never been to one, but it sounds like a lot of fun. 

Anyway, the point is that you wear a really nice, or at least unusual/interesting, gun to show off a little.

I don't have any highly polished, gold-plated guns. I tend to find those boring, even if they look nice. But I do have a couple of ideas of what I'd wear in such a case.

My DL-15, shown above, is probably my top choice. It might not be anyone else's idea of a BBQ gun, but I really like it. And, judging by the reactions I get at the shooting range, it's interesting and unusual.

If I had to choose a backup, or if the invitation demanded a BBQ revolver, I'd wear my "Man With No Name" 1851 Navy.

If you were to pick a BBQ gun for yourself- either from your collection or from your want list- what would you choose?

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I don't trust these experts either

Every time Bitcoin starts tumbling and the “experts” go back to predicting its demise, I graciously offer a Bitcoin Disposal Service, so that they can anonymously rid themselves of the doomed crypto.

Funny thing is that no one ever takes advantage of the offer.

That tells me that either they don’t believe what they say, or they don’t have any Bitcoin anyway, so why would I listen to them reassuring themselves they didn't miss the boat? 

It’s kind of funny.

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The Statist "solution"

The foundational statist lie is that if you don't want government involved in everyone's life, you "don't care" about them.

One such example from one of statism's brightest:
"The libertarian solutions (all of them) come down to a simple one-liner, 'Just let the poor people die.'"

As opposed to the statist solutions (all of them), which come down to, "People are government's property; kill them if they resist".

Yeah, that's so much more caring. Right? LOL

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The Script

I've discovered that when responding to statists online, they follow a few rather rigid scripts. It could also be thought of as executing a program, but to think of it as a script seems more human.

This is one of the most common scripts:

Ignore the mountain of evidence all around.
Demand evidence.
Receive evidence.
Say "I'm not reading all that!"
Demand more specific evidence.
Receive more specific evidence.
Say, "That's an isolated case."
Demand different evidence.
Repeat.

Once they start following The Script, they've shown they are immune to reason and can be ignored. It's a waste of time to try to reason with them.

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I have an unplanned vet visit coming up this afternoon.

Choose your own adventure

I saw someone saying that if you think things are bad now, just wait. They’re going to get worse. Much worse.

Maybe. Probably.

The smart way to approach it is to make it an adventure. You don't want "boring", do you? 

Well, the political criminals and other archators running things are working to make sure you live in "interesting times". They're working as hard as they can to impose a police state of surveillance and control, while at the same time letting their freelance soulmates run amok and violate you from the other side. It's a team effort, and you're designated to be the pawn.

You might as well find ways to enjoy it while it lasts.

It's not as though you have the option to avoid it.

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Money for preps? 

If not, that’s OK.

Wait... who's "terminally online"?

Besides using the ad hominem of "bot", detractors will often say their object of attention is "terminally online". 

They'll say directly that any opinion you hold that differs from their acceptable opinion is the result of you being "terminally online". 

It's too bad for this claim when those opinions predate the internet, sometimes by decades.

It's also strange when the people grasping for this insult then think you've "run away" from the discussion when it took you "too long" to respond... because you weren't online.

But, when you're a statist, you've got to grasp at any straws you can create, since logic and reason aren't working in your favor.

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What do you think? Value for value? 

If not, that’s OK.

Don't get distracted

Sometimes, it's easy to get distracted and make stupid mistakes. You lose focus for just a second, and suboptimal things happen.

Such as the event in the picture above.

Fortunately, some of those mistakes are merely irritating and inconvenient rather than disastrous. I've barely missed disasters* on occasion, so I can appreciate the merely unpleasant.

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*There was this one time that involved a burning candle, a full powder horn, and a distracted brain...

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"Bots"

I've discovered that when anyone feels like they are losing a debate to you, the trendy new ad hominem is to call you a "bot".

I guess when your logic and rational thinking skills appear to the other person to be superhuman, compared to their own ability, they just assume you're a computer.

It also seems to me that these people put the bar very low, so as to make themselves feel better.

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"I can't refute what you say, so I'll complain about the words you use!"

The other day, someone objected to my phrasing when I said cops (one in particular) are "dishonest yellow-bellied tail-tuckers". 

He couldn't refute the facts; he just didn't like the creative way I called them "lying cowards" (and he kept harping on the particular words I used) in a response to the post about the cop who shot a teenager in the back and killed him, then lied that the victim was "holding a gun" (it was a phone).

So, he compared me to Yosemite Sam.

In a follow-up comment, he tried taking a potshot at my "yellow flag" and said I was the real coward because I never "served my country" [sic].

Sometimes, I am heartened by the low quality of those who hate the things I say, but who, instead of trying to use reason, resort to assumptions and ad hominem. It's kind of awesome, actually.

People who will fight on behalf of a government are the same sort of people who can be brainwashed into flying airliners into buildings. Yeah, it's bravery, but a twisted, worthless sort of harmful bravery.

There are things that some people get very excited about that I find completely reprehensible. That gulf will never be bridged. But you can make a counterargument, or you can flail around looking silly. He chose the looking-silly path.

And, if a cop thinks the reasonable response to seeing an armed individual (or someone he is scared might be armed) is to murder him, the cop has no business being out in public. Exercising your natural human rights isn't a capital offense. Unless you encounter a cop who is a lying coward, apparently.

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The odds were in my favor

I know it's normal for a principled liberty lover to be called a "Democrat" and "MAGA" on the same day, but I recently got called a Leftist and a "sovereign citizen" (by different government supremacists) because of my stance on one topic.

It was because I don't believe governments have any "authority" to require driver's licenses or that cops have the "right" to demand to see them. (People are still free to disagree with me and be wrong...)

I'm pretty sure this double-whammy means I win the Libertarian Hunger Games.

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Quite unlike libertarianism

“Statism may be a mess, but unlike libertarianism, it’s real and stable.” ~ A wise statist's opinion as expressed to me.

Statism: 

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You can laugh at the bad guys

(My Eastern New Mexico News column for December 31, 2025)

Happy New Year!

I can't help it. I feel a bit optimistic for 2026. No one spiked my eggnog, either.

Maybe it's because I had a really nice Christmas, with lots of family and food, and only one relatively minor dog bite. I was neither the bitten nor the owner of the biter, so this is a plus.

It feels as though a page is turning; my past troubles are behind me, to be replaced by exciting new troubles.

Maybe it's because the supporters of tyrants of various kinds have become so ridiculous it's just funny. Still dangerous, but more like fans of killer clowns than serious people. The masks are slipping a little more every day, and it's good for the rest of us to see the truth.

Partly, it might even be that it seems some things have hit rock bottom and don't have anywhere but up to go. Please don't shatter this illusion!

If the coming year sees the economy rally, great! I'm ready to celebrate.

If, though, it sees the economy tank, I have those bases covered as well. At least, as well as I can in my current situation. I hope you can say the same. It's not "paranoia" to prepare; it's your responsibility whether you want to or not.

Further, I'm not going to base my mental health on what political criminals say or do. I expect nothing but more of the same from them.

It's liberating when you realize how little effect they have on you. Their opinions (which they'll insist are laws) are little more than hot air, even with their hired guns roaming the streets to enforce them against you. People have always had to avoid the highwaymen and other criminal gangs, official and freelance. To expect this to change while so many still fall for the myth that government is necessary or good is to expect the Sun to stay up later if you order people to mis-set their clocks in the Spring and pretend the time has changed.

Be of good cheer in the New Year, and remain so when the year is no longer new. The best way to defy the bad guys is to enjoy life in spite of all they intend for you. As an acquaintance of mine says, "The Ultimate Answer to Kings is not a bullet, but a belly laugh!" Poke them in their evil eye with your smile.

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Building the Empire

Trump wants to empower the Empire, but he's only authorizing more surface vessels. For all I know (and I don't care enough to research it), he may be authorizing a few new atmospheric craft, as well, but BORING...

If he's not building TIE fighters, Star Destroyers, and a Death Star, is he really accomplishing anything for the Empire?

He might as well be issuing "new and improved" atlatls.

If you're going to build the Empire, then go all in and build the Empire. The Mandalorians and other rebels are waiting.

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If you don't speak to your cat about 'nip...

Who will? 

This is your cat.

This is your cat on catnip.

Any questions?

Yes, that's the cat I call MommyCat, who is the source of all the kittens I keep feeding, sheltering, and trying (and failing) to save. She almost always looks grouchy, but not when she's relaxing in her catnip patch.

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Kitten rescue fund

Relationship rules- State level

Our Relationship Rules:

• You will not trade with others unless you pay me for my permission first, or you'll get locked in a cage. For some things, like alcohol and guns, you'll have to beg and pay me twice. (Because I don't like you having access to them, but I'm afraid you might throw me out if I flat out deny them to you.) And getting my permission means you'll let me nose through all your papers and harass your customers anytime I feel like it. You'll thank me for it.
  
  
• You aren't allowed to hire any help unless you pay them what I say. Or I'll destroy your livelihood and lock you in a cage
  
  
• Your car belongs to me, as demonstrated by the plate I'll force you to rent and affix to it, and you can only use it as long as I say you can.
  
  
• You won't travel faster in your car than some arbitrary speed I've decided on, or I'll stop, molest, and rob you. I might decide to lock you in a cage or kill you if I get scared. The same goes for wearing a seat belt.
  
  
• You must at all times carry the identification card I'll rent you, and you will not use your vehicle without it.
  
  
• You have to insure your car to my standards, and carry proof that you've done so, through those I've made arrangements with, or I'll take it from you. With violence if you resist.
  
  
• Your house and land will remain my property forever, which you can keep using only as long as you pay a yearly ransom. Your money is also mine, for you to use only as long as you continue to hand a percentage of it to me.
  
  
• You will hand your children over to my employees to be indoctrinated into believing I am good and necessary for survival. You will, of course, have to pay an excessive fee for this "service" or I'll take your property to sell to someone more compliant. I may also take "your" children and give them to someone else to raise. You must pretend I am educating the children.
  
  
• If I don't feel like others have strict enough rules against you owning, carrying, and using weapons of defense, I'll impose my own additional rules. You'll only defend yourself from others with my permission, which you'll never quite be sure of having. And, if you do, I'll steal your weapon and lock you in a cage, only letting you out if you can prove you didn't really mean it. 
  
  
• You are never allowed to use weapons against me, no matter how abusive or threatening you believe I have become. Or I will kill you or lock you in a cage.
  
  
• Certain plants can only be grown, sold, or consumed if I say so, and if I can find a way to get you to pay me. Otherwise, I'll lock you in a cage.
  
  
• You can only play games using money as a way of keeping score if I say so. And if I'm getting a piece of the action, obviously.
  
  
• I can make up any new rule at any time. I'll decide which rules I will enforce, and when.
  
  
• If you cross some imaginary line, any or all of these rules may change because you're now in a relationship with someone else.
  
  

This is kind of a joke, and kind of not.

I still like the format of the other list better.

There's a lot of overlap between the state's relationship rules and the federal rules. Some of the above could be added to the federal rules- and probably should be.

Here are the local rules.

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Relationship rules

I originally got this idea from the LP of Louisiana, and then I modified it a little. 

I used to print it out, fold it up, give it a little pocket wear and tear, and then casually drop it in public places. I don't know if anyone ever picked a copy up and read it, or what effect it had if they did. But I found it funny to think about. Maybe I'll start doing that again. Anyway, here's the note...

Our Relationship Rules: 

* You will not make money without telling me. 

* If you trade, you can only do so with my permission. 

* You will not own anything I don't approve of, or I'll lock you in a cage. 
* You will pay me a large percentage of your income, or get locked in a cage.

* If you do not pay me whatever I demand, you will get locked in a cage. 

* I will take your money as I see fit and spend it as I want. My friends will get a cut. 

* You will not leave my property without my permission. 

* If you attempt to leave my property after getting my permission, I will grope you while bystanders watch before I decide if I'll allow you to go. 

* If you want friends to come over from another place, they must get my permission first. I will grope them. If they are someone I don't approve of, I may put them in the cage or send them back home without letting them see you. 

* You will let me listen in on your phone calls, texts, emails, or any other communications. You will let me bug your computer and watch you and listen to you through its camera and microphone, even if you're not using it. 

* I will monitor your every movement by tracking your cell phone. 

* I will ask you to publicly show your approval of me from time to time. If you don't, my friends will visit you at home and confront you in public, demanding you make this show of loyalty. If you don't do so to my satisfaction, I may put you in the cage.

* If you try to defend yourself from my henchmen, they will kill you- or put you in the cage if you survive.

* If you resist being locked in the cage, I will kill you.

* I will change these rules in my favor whenever I feel like it, and there's nothing you can do but beg me not to. 

* If you complain about any of the above, it's a sign you don't love me, and I may lock you in the cage to teach you to respect me. 

Your loving companion,
The Federal Government of the United States of America

Here are the state-level rules and the local rules.

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Hyperbolic Hillary

Oh, to be Hillary, the hyperbolic alcoholic (allegedly).

Could someone please "destroy" part of my house and build me an addition I'd enjoy? 

I'd really like an indoor (underground!) shooting range, just in case anyone is looking for ideas.

As for the White House, I have an idea what the entire facility could be better used for... if it's really my house. Hillary wouldn't lie about that, would she?

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The freeloaders

For the first time ever, one of the cats in the house has killed a mouse. But I'm not sure who to reward and who to tell to do better.

Then, a couple of them kept alerting me to more mice in the A/C closet, and I managed to trap two more. Now the cats are indicating there are no more. We'll see.

It's a good thing they are cute, because they are quite expensive for the contributions they make. Kind of like me.

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