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How rude! |
Thinking back on a previous post, I got to remembering how many times in my life I've been called "rude" or something similarly negative because I asserted my autonomy. And it's a lot!
One person has repeatedly told me that by not allowing them to control me, I am forcing my will on them. I am being rude and should be ashamed.
Once I was working for a staffing service-- which was my actual boss-- when the job-site boss told me to move a stack of long metal poles from one location to another, outdoors, in the middle of a severe thunderstorm. Following the staffing service's explicit directions to not do anything I considered dangerous, I refused. I explained why I couldn't do that. I was kicked off the job after being screamed at for being lazy and useless. The staffing service supported my decision, though.
Because I don't fawn over police and military-- I don't thank them for their service when I encounter them in the wild-- I am told I am rude. I don't slam doors in their faces, spit on them, or even give them the evil eye. As long as they aren't actively doing wrong right now, I treat them as I would treat any other random stranger. But neglecting to fawn over them is "rude".
I don't often give anything to panhandlers, nor take flyers from anyone handing them out. If I say anything, I keep it to "No thanks". There have been a couple of occasions where the person wouldn't take "No" for an answer and I was more assertive, but I only push back as hard as I have to. I won't be bullied. I've been told this, too, is "rude".
I've been called "rude" for ignoring statist rituals to worship Holy Pole Quilt. So be it.
I have no respect for your favorite politician or bureaucrat. I'm not going to fake that I do. Don't press me to give my opinion unless you're strong enough to hear it. And don't call me "rude" if you don't like what you hear; what I didn't want to say in the first place.
I prefer to be civil. I like to be nice. But not at the expense of liberty or truth. You've got to have a line-in-the-sand somewhere. A line no one can push you across, using your desire to be nice as a weapon against you. If standing up for yourself (or someone else) makes you "rude" in another's eyes, the problem is theirs.
The same people who call a person "rude" just for politely refusing to cross a personal boundary probably also think all cats are standoffish and aloof. They, too, aren't naturally slaves. I respect a person who is politely assertive and won't be controlled and I don't think it's rude at all!
ReplyDelete-Roh