Monday, April 04, 2022


Today I have an appointment to see a doctor about something I don't want to see a doctor about. It has had me really upset for the past couple of weeks-- ever since the office called to tell me they had made this appointment that I knew nothing about. Medical issues (even potential ones I didn't know about) make me feel helpless and wrecked. Ever since my bike wreck when I was 12, I've had an irrational panic over medical things and I hate being around doctors, no matter the context.

I know it has affected my writing-- and even my ability to write anything-- recently. I find it hard to think about anything else. As the appointment approaches, the effect has been even worse. For that, I apologize.

There's really no way this appointment can go any way that makes me happy unless they say "Oops. Never mind." Suggesting tests to be done isn't a good outcome-- in fact, that's the one I dread the most. 

I may not mention this again, so there may be no updates.

For more info: link


  1. Pray to God and turn it over to Him. I have had two life threatening medical issues and He has brought me through them both. Peace and harmony to you.

  2. I hear you about tests! I don't have quite as much dread over them but I can certainly imagine it. Most issues can be treated a lot better and more completely when caught early though so at least there's that. Also I'm glad you have medical care of some kind, many of us don't. You'll get through it and I understand. :-) -Roh