It's a constant frustration for me to warn someone about an issue I can see on the horizon only to be scoffed at or told I am lecturing. Then-- at least when it's my personal life-- to be expected to fix the problem once it happens. After my warning was completely ignored.
It happens so often as to be a theme.
It's the same whether I'm warning people in public about looming inflation, warning people to prep, or warning someone in private that they are ignoring something that's going to cause a problem in the near future.
Do you experience this, too?
I am often a good "fixer", but I'd rather avoid issues I see approaching, heading them off before they become problems that need to be fixed. But when I warn others, and it's up to them to do something to avoid this future problem, they usually don't. Then they expect me to fix what their inaction caused. I guess they think it's easier to let the problem happen and then have me fix it. I should just refuse to do so, but I won't.
To be honest, I've been guilty of ignoring the warnings of others, too. More when I was younger, but it still happens sometimes. So I guess I can't be too hard on others.
I've come to believe that they're probably not relying on you. I think most people prefer to have bad things happen to them over becoming responsible. I don't mean that they then regret it when they've failed to prepare and experience the results. They literally prefer the pain of the disaster to the idea that they might be able to do something about it.
ReplyDeleteIf that prefer that, then it seems to me that they're making the "correct" choice.
And though I "don't have a button for that", and could never prefer happenstance to preparedness, I'm not sure they're wrong - I think I might have an easier and happier life if I could think that way.
The reason I believe they are relying on me is that I get a really angry reaction if I say "You made your bed, now lie in it". If I refuse to help fix the problem I am punished for my laziness or selfishness, because "What else is so important that you can't do this?"
DeleteI agree with you though-- it would be easier to just refuse to take any responsibility. Happier? I'm not sure. Maybe, if I could change the way I think about things.
"Not my job."
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