Friday, August 08, 2008

Sex and Marriage: One Size Does NOT Fit All

Warning: due to the nature of this post, reader discretion is advised.

If you are easily offended, I apologize, but feel that this is an important issue that has ramifications for us all. Nothing illustrates the stupidity of such things as the "Defense of Marriage Act" better.

I was recently watching a program on TLC about a pair of conjoined twins. These young women look externally (to a non-expert such as myself) like a two-headed person. Internally they each have their own heart, lungs, stomach, and small intestine. They share a colon and reproductive system. They each control the leg and arm on their side of the shared body, and only feel sensation on that side as well.

Please realize I have profound respect for these girls. They are probably the most inspiring individuals I have ever run across on television. I only refrain from mentioning their names and other specifics out of respect for their privacy and in case the state has decided there is some "law" against speculating on the sexuality of these girls due to age or other factors.

As I understand life, what is a "right" for one person is a "right" for everyone, and what is wrong for one person to do is wrong for everyone. (Thanks to Francois Tremblay for bringing this unconscious understanding into conscious thought for me.) I am not speaking of preferences, but morality. In other words, since it is wrong for me to kick in a neighbor's door at 2AM and shoot his dog, then kidnap him, it is also wrong for a thug with a badge and "official" permission to do the same. Which brings us to the dilemma. The state and most religions would condemn these girls to a sexless life. Even the simple, ubiquitous act of masturbation becomes incest in this case.

The program showed the state giving each girl her own "driver's license" in order to be allowed to operate a car. I would expect the state to think it has the same authority (and "solution") to the marriage question. I would hope that these girls reject the notion of government permission to marry, but in case they choose to place themselves in that position, how would that work?

If they accept the mainstream religious ideas and morals they are doomed to be virgins forever, or be guilty of "sexual sins", since threesomes would be unavoidable. If one girl marries, then the partner is "cheating" on her each time they have intercourse. There is no way to only have sex with one at a time, given the shared nature of their reproductive system. If they both marry one person (a guy, for example) he would be a bigamist in the eyes of the state. If they each marry a different individual, then, once again, in the eyes of the state and religion, they are unable to avoid "adultery".

If they have children, both girls would be the biological mothers. Would the state draw up a birth certificate with three spaces for parents? If not, how would they handle that situation?

Of course, you and I know that asking permission from the state for any of these things is ridiculous. These two wonderful young women may not realize that. Yet. Would the state make exceptions to all these "laws" in their case? If so, then that would mean they should allow any couple or group that wishes, to get a marriage license. If there is no room in your state or your religion for the situation these young women find themselves in, then there is something wrong with your state or your religion. Only in the self-ownership of anarchism could these girls find the freedom to live guilt-free and happily. What is OK for them must be OK for the rest of us, and what is OK for the rest of us is OK for them. If the state doesn't make exceptions, then it would probably force these girls to become "outlaws" like you and I. There are far worse fates.

Persecution and/or prosecution may be avoided due to the state and religion not having thought of these issues yet, or through fear of public outrage (though, even in recent cases of astounding state evil, public outcry has been almost nonexistent).


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