Here are some new mottos for government programs, agencies, and people.
The USA PATRIOT Act: "Protecting you from liberty." or "Giving the government more ability to combat Liberty."
The IRS: "You would have just wasted your money on food and rent anyway."
TSA: "Making air travel safe for terrorists."
BATFE: "Ensuring the government's monopoly on force grows stronger each day."
FDA: "Making your life and death decisions so you and your doctor won't have to."
CIA: "Creating foreign terrorists for the next generation."
The military: "Helping tyranny in the name of freedom."
Department of Education: "Creating submissive serfs through ignorance".
The Federal Reserve: "Making your money worthless to enrich ourselves."
The Democratic National Committee: "Still pretending we are different than the Republicans".
The Republican National Committee: "Still pretending we are different than the Democrats."
The Libertarian Party: "Pretending to still have principles."
The Supreme Court: "Grabbing power that is not ours to take since 1803."
Congress: "Still the opposite of progress."
EPA: "The world's worst polluter ordering you to protect the environment."
Department of Agriculture: "Preventing preparedness through bribery."
Department of Energy: "Innovation in private hands scares us!"
DEA: "Killing for chemicals."
Department of Justice: "Oops. We meant 'just us'"
Border Patrol: "Your friendly jailers."
Police departments across the land: "We are the 'standing army' your founders warned you about!"
National Firearms Act of 1934: "Infringing on your 'militia-appropriate weapons' just to see if we could get away with it. And we have for 74 years and still counting!"
Gun Control Act 0f 1968: "What 'slippery slope'?"
The Brady Act: "Look where momentum will take you."
Obama: "It depends what you mean by 'hope' and 'change'."
McCain: "I hope you mean to change my Depends."
Barr: "I hope and depend on a change in what 'liberty' means.
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Very nice :) I stand in solidarity with your earnest mockery!
ReplyDeleteBravo,Kent!!
ReplyDeleteGlad ya'll liked them.
ReplyDelete